Blaring sirens tore me from sleep at 2am. The entire town was screaming in a high pitched whine that I had never heard projected over the loud speaker system before (my town has loud speakers scattered all over the valley that carry town-wide announcements and sing little tunes at 7am, noon, and 5pm). My mind began to make a list of possible reasons why an alarm was being sounded.
North Korea had finally cracked and launched their missiles.
or could it be the Chinese?!
no, that’s crazy, it must be zombies. The cold weather had pushed them down from the mountain aeries and a horde of undead was soon to assail my home.
I began to panic. Then, a firm male voice came over the loud speakers. “Japanesejapanesejapanesejapanesejapanese. Japanesejapanesejapanese….japanese”
What? Was it possible I understood none of that?!
Deadly silence followed and I clutched my blankets thinking what I should do. I walked over to the window and parted the curtains just a little to look out. Thick fog consumed the surrounding fields and the pulsing yellow stop light barely beamed down the street. Zombies.
Okay, think…remember your training. First, stay calm. Next, pee. What? I have to pee. Really? Yes. Okay, just don’t turn on any lights or make any noise…the zombies don’t know I’m home and if they can’t see me or hear me, I may survive.
I walked down my steep, creaky stairs to the bathroom with more grace and care than ever before and looked nervously at the massive sliding glass doors that take up a wall in both my downstairs room and kitchen (why on earth I would ever need so many sliding glass doors is beyond me. They only serve to carelessly release the heating and provide a really great entry point for zombies). I entered the bathroom and completed my task, then carefully glided back upstairs to hide in bed.
Silence still held the land. Then faintly, I heard a siren…it was getting closer…was it an ambulance? Fire truck? I didn’t dare approach the window again.
After a few minutes and several passing sirens, I began to calm down. Time passed…not sure how much…and then the wailing town alarm sounded. Again the voice came over the loud speaker and again I understood nothing (time to hit the books again). The feelings of dread and tension passed and I drifted back to sleep.
This morning at school I asked what all the noise was about during the night and was told that there was a house fire in town. Not sure of the extent of the damage, but I don’t think it was too bad.
Been here a year and a half and still having new and exciting events in the middle of the night.
Monday, January 22, 2007
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Santa and the Japanese Kancho
Friends, this is a true story. Many of you have heard about the Japanese kancho—the two finger jab attack aimed at a victim’s rear—and today I bring you REAL FOOTAGE of the kancho in action. This is me as Santa playing with some Japanese kids. After they had thoroughly investigated my costume, they wanted to see how I would react to the kancho. They were also curious to see what was inside my pants. My friend Rhoda stands by and tries to assist. Gigi is the one filming (bless her for capturing this moment).
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Monday, January 08, 2007
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
